Author Topic: B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted  (Read 3257 times)

Toedancer

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B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted
« on: September 09, 2006, 10:31:46 PM »
HI all,
Home early. I apologize that I have not read all the threads since having to come home early. My B-I-L passed today with his wife at his side. My SO is inconsolable, but is buried at the moment with sand-blasted Catholic stuff around the house. Sand-Blasted, such a quaint term, yet so mightily correct. Oh Ireland, how could you do this to our men? There are candles burning in every room in my house right now.

Anyway, I spent those short 4 days with my best-gf. I worked my ass off getting up her LR drapes, her DR drapes, her BR drapes. Tore down what was there in both baths. She has a bum right arm, I have a bum left arm. We are both lefties. So we simply sideled (sp?) our ladders up bum to bum and each used the arm that was worth something to mark, screw, (thingy before screw, henceforth known as tbs) and tired the hell out of our arms, until we got the drapes up. She complained alot about people-before-her, and that they were not construction people.  I said thats life. She's picky cos dad raised her on construction sites.

Then I went to look for her kitty. I hunted, scowled the entire neighbourhood, it is skittish so figured it was in a garage somewhere. Spoke with children, told them about fluffy tail. Of course they all seen him, then of course they meant well in Walt Disney movies. So went to Animal Services, did that stuff. Staples did the pics. Stapled them on posters and shit. Found a gorgeous male to take his place.

B-gf is kind of well frozen in place. Has no idea why she left her 20 year Social Services job, now she has no benefits. She's all kind of other-wordly. I am let's fix your nest up. Figure it out later. She smokes doobies, I don't. I had wine. Then I had to find out what grocery store satisfies her. She only shopped at Zehrs, which is rich-wo-man's Loblaws. Found it. Took her there. She got everything she wanted. Organic meat, organic vegetables, organic cosmetics, organic t.p., organic everything. Holy Shite, now I am in shock as to her bill! I shop at the local food bank.
She thought nothing of it.

But I learned stuff. You mustn't use take your B vitamins until you've taken some fat, like toast and butter. You musn't use Evening Primose (for hot flashes) without using Salmon Oil, cos one makes the other act. Who knew? She was completely eureka when I found her the Mineral Salt Block for deodorant. That's for people who stink with body odour. This stuff is amazing apparently. I bought one for mom, and I bought one for daughter thinking I don't want aluminum in her body with normal anti-deod. Anyay she insisted on paying. Okay. She has a naturopath, so I just took her word for this stuff.

I saw no news, I read no news. She doesn't take in news in any form whatsoever. Who knew? I had some jonesing about that. Didn't tell. She had no online either. The Fri. night storm was frikkin amazing, being west and right down by the lake. Hail, lightning, wonderful stuff. I was on the front porch just digging it, but she wasn't too interested, being so into herself and all. I had empathy, but not alot. She took me to dinner, then to see Depp in Pirates. I decided right then I would never want to be a man, UNLESS I could be a pirate or a complete scoundrel. I think I would make a great scoundrel.

Then I dragged her to a amazing walk that she didn't know existed in her neighbourhood. Tons of birds, tons of open, dead spaces, full of peckers and shit.  Holy Shite, this is getting long and I am not even half finished.
So be it. Shall return. Leave Tues. for Wake until Thurs. for funeral.

Ta.
"Democracy is not the law of the majority, it's the protection of the minority." -Albert Camus 1913-1960

Toedancer

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B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted
« Reply #1 on: September 09, 2006, 10:32:26 PM »
OMG :shock: Forgot to mention we had a big fight around feminism.
"Democracy is not the law of the majority, it's the protection of the minority." -Albert Camus 1913-1960

skdadl

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B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted
« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2006, 07:10:15 AM »
I'm sorry to hear about the b-i-l, Toedancer, and about all the stresses you have been helping others through. I mean, I see some inspiring stuff in there, but it is tiring, isn't it, going up and down that much in a short time.

 :hug

Debra

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B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted
« Reply #3 on: September 10, 2006, 08:54:43 AM »
Sorry to hear about your brother in law TD.

Don't forget to take care of yourself too. :grouphug
“Damaged people are dangerous. They know they can survive.” —  Josephine Hart

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B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted
« Reply #4 on: September 10, 2006, 10:39:49 PM »
I am sorry for your loss, Toedancer.  :hug

I am also sorry that your friend had to lose a cat. Glad you could get another so fast.

That was a really nice intro post to read. Do come back and tell us more. Besides the fight about feminism and the lack of news, it sounds like you had a positive, supportive stay. But those are good things too sometimes.

I hope you are feeling well. Lots of love and strength to you and yours....

Toedancer

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B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted
« Reply #5 on: September 10, 2006, 11:31:13 PM »
Thanks so much you guys. Phone has been ringing and ringing. Arrangements. Euology to write. Hotel room for one night. Yucky ex-wife was upset my name is in obituary, so she forced the issue and I just told S-I-L, who cares, just say 'of s-i-l _____'. I mean really? how petty is that? And I have to actually SEE her as well.

My D absolutely loved her chest. Very low tech, so she was surprised. And she loved seeing her name and it's meaning (Warrior Woman) beside it , on the wee brass plaque I had made.  My gf is not going to put the mailbox I made her up, she said she'd save it when she bought a house. She wants to work (at something) for another few years and then buy near a lake somewhere.

I don't think I've changed much (well yes obviously materially) but not in values/beliefs/passions etc., and I was kinda stunned how self-involved gf was/is. And she was very competitive, took me a bit to twig on to that. Couldn't figure out what the energy was, I didn't like it. When I figured it out of course I spotted it constantly. So I just thought wow she's feeling insecure, leaving her job, moving to the city and stuff. She's a high strung person, I know that, but she didn't want to talk about it. And she never once asked how my SO was doing, in fact she talked about herself the entire time. At one point I thought about leaving early cos she was driving me nuts. Anyway, this is sad to say, but after 30 years I think we're worlds apart now.

Well I'm off to the Dermatologist in the morning. Wee dry patch on nose G.P. wants checked out. If I learn any beauty secrets I'll tell.
"Democracy is not the law of the majority, it's the protection of the minority." -Albert Camus 1913-1960

Toedancer

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B-I-L has passed/Break Interrupted
« Reply #6 on: October 22, 2006, 12:49:26 AM »
Holy Shite I forgot about this thread,.
S-I_L is doing better. Talked with her tonight. She has a redecorated apartment in Cayuga. Just 3 short blocks to her home with my SO's brother.
Very strange. We actually did laugh about stuff. Yet she is still sorting stuff out. It's very hard. But we Laughed! SO is in bath, gotta go.
"Democracy is not the law of the majority, it's the protection of the minority." -Albert Camus 1913-1960

 

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